"Make room for Gene so he can play. He's the only cleric we know."

 

- Advanced Dungeons & Dragons -

"You got the mirror mirror in your palm, and every little whim has been embalmed."

 

- Prince of the Blood -

"I'll feast on your wife and shit out your child."

- Hobogoblin -

Scorpiknox (pronounced scorp-in-ox) is a rock band for people who like catchy guitar riffs and sing-along vocal hooks. Inspired by Iron Maiden, Faith No More, System of a Down, Queens of the Stone Age, and HORSE the Band, Scorpiknox blends their favorite ingredients into a unique kind of radio-friendly hard-rock/punk/metal. 

Song topics range from the gritty realities involved with playing Advanced Dungeons & Dragons to modern society's tiresome obsession with celebrity and wealth. Scorpiknox is thoughtfully eclectic with their lyrics, leveraging absurdity and social commentary in equal parts.

 

Musically, Scorpiknox considers themselves a rock/punk/metal hybrid. They've been called "very punky" by keyboard players not interested in collaboration as well as "not as good as Jack White" by a hipster art student one time. Recently, another band's drummer was like "Yeah, you guys are really tight. Can I have one of those cigarettes?" With those kinds of critical accolades driving them on, Scorpiknox is ready to soar into the new decade upon the wings of a Rock & Roll freedom eagle.

Who Exactly are These Guys?

G.I.B. Gormley

Star Sign: Virgo

Favorite Flower: Daffodil

Favorite Flour: Semolina

G.I.B. was born to be a singer but didn't realize it until the voices in his head made him the next American Idol. He's a hot mess on and off the stage, so watch out ladies.

Vocals

Masa Kobayashi

Star Sign: Pisces

Favorite Spice: Marjoram

Favorite Smell: Hot pork

Masa is an android designed and built in a secret Tokyo laboratory by the legendary Dr. Fumo Takagawa. Activated in the late 1990's, he has been a fully operational bass mecha for 20+ years. He has no emotions and is not afraid to strangle unruly fans with his bass strings. He has diplomatic immunity and will not be prosecuted.

Bass

Devon Summers

Star Sign: Virgo

Favorite Food: Vegans

Favorite DJ: Michael Fishman

Like everyone else in Seattle, Devon plays guitar in a band. He once drunkenly told a Camaro full of teenage boys that he loved them. He excels at making others uncomfortable and can be a real buzzkill.

Guitar & Vocals

Aaron Nicholes

Car Sign: Ford Taurus

Favorite Social Media Network: Adult Friend Finder

Favorite Dinosaur: Megasaurus

Aaron reluctantly joined Scorpiknox after Masa gave him a home-made coupon for a lifetime supply of no-questions-asked foot rubs. Aaron has become dependent on these foot rubs in his old age and thus will only quit Scorpiknox if Masa malfunctions.

Drums

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